When I was pregnant with my firstborn, I entertained the idea of homeschooling this perfect, impressionable, new life. It was a lovely thought inside my mind. I was working full time then and desperately wanted an excuse to be able to stay home. Around the age of 2, my son was diagnosed with a communication disorder and started receiving early intervention services at home. Through early intervention, we were introduced to our public-school system. In consideration of my son’s needs, including social interaction, my husband and I decided early on that entering our son into our town's awesome public-school system would be the best choice for him and our family.
Fast forward to reality (circa March 2020). I was standing with a neighbor at the bus stop chatting about a rumor that school was going to shut down (like that day) because of Covid-19. I even mentioned to my neighbor that I had always wanted to homeschool and said, “This could be cool!” Boy oh boy, was I wrong.
I am not a teacher.
Teachers are, quite frankly, saints in my book now. I struggled hard. My kids struggled hard. I found myself wanting to throw school laptops out the window (I never did!) and hiding in the bathroom (I did. A lot). The amount of times I apologized to my kids for losing it on them is embarrassing. It took me a few weeks of torturing myself before I eventually accepted that this was really happening and that my top priority would no longer be my kids’ education. Instead, I would focus on their happiness and mental health. Of course, we still logged on every day and did some schoolwork, but I no longer stressed if things did not go perfectly, or if we missed a zoom call, or if nobody wanted to visit a virtual museum that day. I purchased a prize box and rewarded them for working hard. I instituted mandatory 2 block walks every day in the beginning of our quarantine. It got us out of the house and our black lab never complained once. That was probably my best idea ever. We got to see neighbors and wave from a distance, found cool rocks that people decorated and hid, and we all got some exercise. My kids even started begging to go on these mandatory walks. I did whatever it took to survive those 14 weeks.
In anticipation of September 2020, I dreaded the thought of sending my kids to school in a hybrid model (partial in school, partial at home), but, also, selfishly, dreaded the thought of homeschooling full time again even more. I decided that the best option for my family and my sanity would be to try the hybrid model. I also managed to find myself volunteering to help a single mom friend with homeschooling her daughter one or two days a week so that she would not need to take time off work. I am not sure why I did that. It just came out of my mouth without even registering in my brain. I am so glad that I did offer up to help my friend. Adding a new kid into the mix has been great. Really hard, but also great. This mom even offered to home school both of my kids one day a week with her daughter so that I can go to work without having to look for a sitter. So, now, I homeschool 2 days a week instead of 3. I am homeschooling with 3 kids on both of my assigned days. My son and friend’s daughter have the same teacher which has been helpful. The kids help each other, they work together, and, most importantly, they laugh together. Yes, I still have my moments where I say “Curse you Covid”, but with the hard work of our schools teachers to help make virtual learning easier for us parents, and the addition of a friend, things are much better this time around.
I wholeheartedly recommend networking with parents in your child’s class to see if they may want to start a “pod” with you. My best advice would be to find a family that has the same teacher and is in the same cohort as your child. This way, your schedules are similar. It is not perfect. It is exhausting and hard, especially for parents like my rockstar friend who now homeschools 3 kids instead of just her 1 on her assigned day. We both continue to do it though because we can see the difference it is making for our kids. It is also refreshing to share some of the burden with another adult instead of tackling it all on our own. We both get it and we both appreciate it. We are in it together.
This arrangement might not work for everyone; I totally understand that. Every child’s needs and necessary accommodations are different. This is just my personal experience and reflection. The perfect image I once had of what homeschooling would be like was nothing more than a fantasy, and I am OK with that. Now I know, homeschooling is hard, parents and kids are not perfect, and the best solution is the one that works for you and your family.
